Walking for exercise

Walking can add minutes to your life.
This enables you at 85 years old
to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
home at $7000 per month. 

My grandpa started walking
five miles a day when he was 60.
Now he's 97 years old
and we don't know where he is.

I like long walks,
especially when they are taken
by peop le who annoy me.

The only reason I would take up walking
is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

I have to walk early in the morning,
before my brain figures out what I'm doing..

I joined a health club last year,
spent about 400 bucks.
Haven't lost a pound.
Apparently you have to go there.

Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise',
I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

The advantage of exercising every day
is so when you die, they'll say,
'Well, she looks good doesn't she.'

If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
start with a small country.

I know I got a lot of exercise
the last few years,......
just getting over the hill.

We all get heavier as we get older,
because there's a lot more information in our heads.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

AND

Every time I start thinking too much
about how I look,
I just find a Happy Hour
and by the time I leave,
I look just fine.

You could run this over to your friends
But just e-mail it to them

13 great benefits of wlking

The Benefits Of Walking

 

  I have been told that there were good reasons to walk. Now I know.

 1. Walking can add minutes to your life. This  enables you
 at  85 years old  to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
  home at $7000 per month. 
 
 2. My grandpa started walking five miles a day  when he was
 60.  Now he's 97 years old and we don't know where the hell he  is. 
 
 3. I like long walks, especially when they are taken by
 people who  annoy me. 
 
 4. The only reason I would take up walking is so that I
 could  hear heavy breathing again. 
 
 5. I have to walk early in the morning,  before my brain
 figures out what I'm doing. 
 
 6. I joined a health club  last year, spent about 400
 bucks.  Haven't lost a pound.  Apparently  you have to visit the club. 
 
 7. Every time I hear the dirty word  'exercise', I wash my mouth out with 
 chocolate. 
 
 8. I do have flabby  thighs, but fortunately, my stomach
 covers them. 
 
 9. The advantage of  exercising every day is so when you
 die, they'll say,  'Well, he looks good  doesn't he.' 
 
 10. If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start 
 with a small country. 
 
 11. I know I got a lot of exercise the last few  years,
 just getting over the hill. 
 
12. You could run this over to your  friends but why not
 just e-mail it to them! 
 
13. We all get heavier as we  get older, because
 there's a lot more information in our heads. 
 
That's  my story and I'm sticking to it, 
 
AND every time I start thinking too  much about how I look,  I
just find a Happy Hour and by the time I leave, I  look just fine.