And then the fight started..... Again

  I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there
we were alongside the road and slowly the other
driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get
soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah,
well I couldn't believe it.... He was a DWARF!!!
He stormed over to my car, looked up at me,
and shouted,
      "I AM NOT HAPPY!!!"
So, I looked down at him and said,   "Well, then which
one are you?" And then the fight started.....
   
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My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming
anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that
goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.' I bought her a
scale. And then the fight started...
   
      ******************************************
   
When I got home last night, my wife demanded
that I take  her someplace, expensive...so, I took her to
a gas station.  And then the fight started...
   
      ******************************************
   
After retiring, I went to the Social   Security office to
apply for Social Security. The woman behind
the counter asked me for my driver's license to
verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left
my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very
sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.
The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I
opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She
said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough
for me' and she processed my Social Security application

      When I got home, I excitedly told my wife
about my experience at the Social Security office.
She said, 'You should have dropped your
pants. You might have gotten disability, too.'
      And then the fight started...